Poetry: How Not to Send Out a Poem


Jennifer as a young woman, in her pajamas

So, then, I slip into sweats, you know,

Torn pants splattered with mustard,

Stains on knees from Cheesy Corned

Clichés chowed down two weeks ago.

T-shirt, sweat moons and tears, proclaims,

“I need, I breed; therefore, it’s art.”

Swine of a poem penned, I jot blarney,

Though I yearn for choice


Arty Sestina, please call, ask me


I sigh and sink,

Deep into the La-z-Boy

And click on FOX 39.

Three a.m.


I wallow in sweat and Verbose farts.


Modifiers bunch around my ankles;

Spitting out Verbal grunts, I shake

Bristled hair without a point, passing

Adverbial gas because it feels so good;

Who’s here to care?

Glomming on buttered Redenbacher’s,

Greasy Similes slide down, pimples erupting

On puns.

Pop one for the ad libber...

Ah, yes, I shall surely die in this chair.


The Suicide Song fades…

My phone dings –

Sestina texting!

“You wanna go for a Ghazal,

With extra cheese?”

Pregnant pause.

“And a Tanka, too?”

Waiting for Sestina…

Waiting for Sestina…

Waiting for Insult…

“What’s a Ghazal without a Tanka?”


“With lots of foam.”


“Okay, then. Pizza Parody in six/three?”

(That is, six

Six-line stanzas and one three-line envoi,

Hold all Imitations).

“I’ll be Rondeau, ASAP.”

I slip the device,

Under worn, Epic T,

Between two big boo boos.

I roll off the chair,

Waddle out –


Word played.


“How Not to Send Out a Poem” is copyright 2021 by Jennifer Semple Siegel and may not be republished or reposted without permission.


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